Decisions, 4 down, 2 to go!

Ok, I am about to be FIRED from being a blogger .... Not sure where the time goes, I realize I am sleeping through the first half of 2010! Well, I have lots of news/updates and most of it is good! I had my 4th chemo "cocktail" on Monday (April 12th) and my first follow-up appt with my surgeon (the AMAZING Dr. Johnson) on Tuesday. We have discontinued the herceptin, until I get a 2nd opinion, which is scheduled for the end of this month at UofW/Fred Hutchinson Cancer Care. My 2nd opinion is with an oncologist who has expertise with herceptin.

Dr. Johnson shared with me, that my tumor has shrunk to the point, that we can consider doing a lumpectonomy. If I do the lumpectonomy, I will need to follow-up with 6 weeks of DAILY radiation. Plus, I will need to be comfortable living with the odds that I have a 10 to 15% greater chance of the cancer returning. If I stay the course with the bilateral, the odds of the cancer returning are less than 1%. I can consider a masectonomy, but again, need to be prepared to live with the %/odds that each year I will have a greater and greater chance of cancer returning. My first reaction is to stay the course with the bilateral. I have decided to let this all wash over me a bit, and make a decision after I get the 2nd opinion regarding the herceptin. The one bit of new news, that I did not realize, at the time of surgery, they will test the sentinental nodes for cancer. NONE of my (many) scans have showed any cancer cells under my arms, but we cannot be sure until they are literally tested during surgery. If the test is positive, I will need to do 6 weeks of daily radiation. I SO hope they will not test positive, but this information is good to know, so I can be mentally and physically prepared if this is the case. For some reason, radiation scares me more than anything. But, my Doctor said it is actually the easiest part of the equation. I am also going to look into the possibility of having the radiation (if needed) up near our summer cabin/Hood Canal.

The other new thing, I learned - my chemo cocktail includes some steroids! That MAY help explain WHY I am GAINING weight during chemo! Yikes! I am determined to reverse the trend/scales in the next six weeks!

For some reason, this was all good news, but I came out of this session with a bit of a case of the "mean reds" (that is a quote from Audrey Hepburn/Holly Golightly from Breakfast at Tiffany's". I just always know I am in for two weeks of feeling "underwater", and then have the GREAT week of feeling normal, knowing I'm headed back... I'm not sure why I refer to my chemo feeling as feeling underwater - because I LOVE to scuba dive, and LOVE being underwater! The feeling is just over-all of feeling verrrrrrry slow, and sometimes that feeling of seasickness, when you come back to the surface. I also usually get these weird headaches after scuba diving. So - that is why I call my chemo feeling as being underwater!

I do spend each part of the day thinking of all the things I have to be thankful for - and there are MANY! Always at the top of the list, my FAMILY and FRIENDS! I was just reading about a Harvard survey regarding cancer free patients. There was a significant statistical correlation between the number of good friends you have and your chances of beating cancer and staying cancer free. Thanks to ALL OF YOU, that has greatly increased my odds!! I read this in Oprah's magazine, and I of course believe everything Oprah says!

My Mom's in Maui, Wayne's heading to Sun River to ski/golf. My great friend Robin is on her way over, and we are going to hang out and have a slumber party! Angie is stopping by tomorrow!

LOVE everyone! Please email and let me know what you are up to!